I Want to Marry an Old Woman.

I know it sounds crazy!
It may not be wise.
I want to marry an old woman,
Much before her senile demise!

I want a blue haired old lady,
Who knows her Ben Gay from her hose disarray!
I want to marry an old woman,
Who can play bingo all day!

She'll rock her rocker until she chokes blue.
It'll match her vericose veins of a similar hue!
I want to marry a toothless old lady,
Who can pucker yet kiss so true!

She'll get her s.s.i. check every month one day.
She'll bet on Bridge and thought she could play.
I want to marry an old woman with hair in her ear,
And can argue without spilling her beer!

She'll be tough as shoe leather,
But will scream at the change in the weather.
I want to marry an old woman whose bones will creak,
So I'll know where she walks and is every week!

She'll be able to spit from a car,
And collect chewed tobacco in a mason jar!
I want to marry an old woman you see,
Because she'll be just as honery as me!

We'll sit on the porch at night,
And argue about everything in sight!
We'll gripe about arthritis that aches,
And each pill we're given to take!

I want to marry an old woman you see,
We'll fuss about how often we pee!
We'll drink cranberry juice from a glass,
And fart showing simply no class.

I want to find an old woman for me,
Who's so blind she can barely see.
That way she won't mind when I stain my shorts,
While watching t.v., the news and the sports.

I want to marry an old woman who can talk and chew,
Her smoker's gum until the flavors through.
That there's the woman for me!
She's so honery she'll live to one hundred and three!